When it is 4:00AM and you can’t sleep, your mind begins to wander. Sometimes these meanderings take you where you really don’t want to go. When my brain tends to dwell on the bad things in the world, incredible political aggressionism (I made up the word), and the wrong decisions I have made throughout my life, I seek refuge in my music. Or the thoughts surrounding music. Or what I believe music to be. For me, music is poetry. It is a way of expressing the feelings that I have that are based on my life experiences, all of the bad decisions I have made, politics, and the state of the world. Here is an example:

The last day of my life. Last day of my life,

Back where I began. Forgiveness in my heart.

I’m just a mortal man.

The best day of my life. Best day of my life.

My thoughts of holding you. No words can ever voice.

A love, that’s oh so true.

You were my only love. You my only love.

I gave you everything. Just wanted you to know.

You made this old heart sing.

Those are partial lyrics from my song called, “Last Day of My Life”. A beautiful, yet haunting melody describing, perhaps, the final words to his wife from my best friend as he succumbed to the ravages of cancer.
Try this next one:

Should I take a drink, or take a pill?

Answers that I seek, testing of my will.

Call me crazy, border the insane…

Drunk or sober, feel the same.

I lose my trust, want to be alone.

Scratching through this life, facing the unknown.

Smiles I seem to wear, mask a hidden frown,

Ordinary people, weigh me down.

They offer little hope, placing chains on me.

What I am today, is what they want to see.

World surrounding me, changing once again.

No ordinary peace found within.

Making me so angry, living life this way.

Now I wonder, can I make it through the day?

Crawling through this world, praying things will change,

Oh so ordinary, oh so strange.

Sometimes I’m happy, mostly I’m just sad.

Find myself alone, somehow makes me glad.

People say, give thanks for what I’ve got.

Deep inside, I know I’m not.

I wrote this song called “Ordinary” for a friend of mine (also a musician) who is a recovered drug addict. His music is wracked with the same pain and anger. Recovery is a lifetime journey.

Well, I could go on and on, but I think you get my drift…think of music as poetry and listen to the words that sometimes come from a place where few people would choose to venture. Thanks for reading. I’m sleepy…think I’ll go back to sleep.